5 Ways to Rebuild Trust after an Affair

So your husband cheated! It is heart shattering and life changing news!

There are no words to describe the magnitude of pain and betrayal!

You may have suspected he had been cheating for some time, but now it is real! 

And on some level, it may feel good to finally know the truth!

But you still don’t know the whole truth!  And that eats away at you. Creating obsessive thoughts!

Rebuilding a marriage may feel like piecing together a broken window with no gloves. 

The wounds are open and as each detail is revealed over the days and weeks ahead, it stings more!

Rebuilding Trust after infidelity doesn’t need to be painful and lengthy!

Yes… There are some difficult emotions to process! But if you are willing to do the inner work, you can heal quicker.

Here’s how to rebuild trust:

1. Take notice each time you feel an unwanted emotion.

Acknowledge your feelings as they come up (fear, jealousy, anger, sadness).  This is your body’s way of communicating to you!  Even if you don’t know which emotions you are feeling (because sometimes they get all mixed together), take note of where you are feeling these emotions in your body.  Are you feeling heaviness in your gut, heart or head? 

2. Release the pain imprinted in your mind from the event.

Go back to the event and cut energetic ties that keep you attached to the memory and pain. Cord Cutting is a powerful tool that allows you to cut energetic unhealthy attachments to events and people that are no longer for your highest good. You can do this in meditation.  Visualize the strings of attachment to your husband’s affair partner, and see yourself using scissors to release yourself from the ties.  (note- this strategy is best done with an expert who can guide you through the process).

3. Learn to trust your intuition again.

After an affair, your confidence and ability to trust your instinct may feel shattered.  And because of this, you may question your gut feelings. With specific exercises, you can learn to confidently listen to and act on your gut reactions again.

4. Stop the affair replay in your mind (obsessive thoughts).

In order to end the recurring flashbacks and never ending possible scenarios within your mind, you need to release the trauma of the affair, which will allow you to rewire your neural pathways with new thoughts that support your healing. This can be done in a coaching session.

5. Rebuild your worth, confidence & self love.

Replace a damaged self-image and self-esteem with love and deservingness for what you truly deserve within a relationship!  Go inward and see your future self. The version of you who is happy, confident and worthy of a loving relationship.  Feel what it is like to be her.  She is always with you, so tap into her power and let her help you heal.

BONUS- Stop Playing Detective & Being a Helicopter Spouse

Acting this way around your spouse keeps you on high alert, causing you stress and overwhelm. In order to release yourself from the high adrenaline state caused by your external world, your body needs calm, stability and safety.  This safe place needs to be created internally, within your body in order to start healing.

READY TO FIX AND HEAL YOUR MARRIAGE?

Would you like my 1-on-1 help creating a customized Free Marriage Roadmap? So you can transform your marriage

If so, book your Complimentary 15 minute “Marriage Roadmap” call where I will give you a strategy that you can implement right away to get your marriage moving in the direction you need to do to save your marriage fast. That’s it.
How to Manage Obsessive Thoughts in Your Marriage
Boundaries
Beth Miller

How to Manage Obsessive Thoughts in Your Marriage

Did your partner cheat on you?  Are you sometimes overcome by anger for what seems like “no” reason? Intrusive thoughts after infidelity are a common and extremely painful symptom of what has been called Post Infidelity Stress Disorder. Often these thoughts come from the “need to know” exactly what happened between your husband and the

Read More »
BEST MARRIAGE TIPS
Boundaries
Beth Miller

Overcoming Marriage Struggles 101

I use this technique with ALL my clients. By the end of our session, they are happy!   Really happy! They feel lighter! Like a weight has lifted off. I use this technique as a quick and easy way to get over… Anger Being a People Pleaser Infidelity & Jealousy Resentment Traumas  Low Self Confidence Grief

Read More »
Marriage Tips
Beth Miller

There is a Hidden Reason Why Couples Counseling Won’t Work

The thing is…. The topic that couples are arguing about is rarely the REAL reason for the disagreement.  Believe it or not! This is why going to couple’s counseling is not the BEST first step to fixing marriage struggles. In fact, going to couples counseling can cause more harm! Couples need to do individual work

Read More »
Marriage Tips
Beth Miller

Should I keep working at my marriage?

Many wives are tormented by the decision to stay or go?  They lose sleep at night thinking about whether their marriage will last! They feel distracted by the noisy, obsessive thoughts about what the future holds. They feel trapped, stuck and lost! Whether to stay in your marriage is a BIG decision!   The good news

Read More »
Marriage Tips
Beth Miller

Wanting the constant arguments with your partner to end?

Fighting constantly over the smallest things with your partner is emotionally and physically draining.  Many wives are so tired of the constant and ongoing arguments.  They often feel like they are  walking on eggshells trying to navigate their husband’s mood, so as to avoid a heated discussion. Some degree of conflict is healthy, as it

Read More »
my husband won't go to marriage counseling
Marriage Tips
Beth Miller

When Your Husband Won’t Go to Therapy

Is your partner refusing to go to therapy?  Does he not feel comfortable sharing your marriage struggles with a stranger? Or maybe he feels like the counselor will gang up on him? Does he not think your marriage struggles are that “bad”? So if your husband won’t go to Couples Therapy, the good news is

Read More »
Scroll to Top

FREE DOWNLOAD

Where should we send your Free Marriage Guide?